Sunday, May 23, 2010

The Best Date Ever

So a few months ago when the blizzard hit the east coast, I was confronted with the daunting task of shoveling out my car.  Now for those of you who were in the blizzard know, this was no ordinary snow fall.  The snow was measured in feet not inches.  As a now single mom, there was no one to help shovel out the snow.  So I got my tools together and went out to tackle the job. After 20 minutes, I had made some good progress.  My arms were burning, my nose running, and despite the frigid temperatures I was drenched in sweat.  Just when I was about to take a break inside, this beautiful man comes up to me shovel in hand and says, "do you need any help?" 

I tried to hold in the back flips, and I calmly said, "any help you can give would be greatly appreciated."  So together we shoveled out my car. He flagged down the guy with the bobcat clearing our apartment parking lot and it cleared out the rest of my space after I had wiggled my huge car free from the spot.  I thanked him profusely and went back inside to warm up and gain the feeling back in my toes.

Since that time, upstairs neighbor guy and I exchanged pleasantries and smiles.  For the past month or so, i've noticed him waiting for me to get out of my car so he can say hello.  So I decide to take this to the next level.  I was growing bored of the pleasantries, the smiles, the looks, I wanted to know what this dude wanted for real.  So I got up the nerve to put a note on the car.  The note said:

Hi neighbor!
I never got the chance to appropriately thank you for helping me shovel out my "tank" during the blizzard.  How about you let me buy you a beer or something.

your downstairs neighbor

I left my number below my name.  That very night he calls and says he would LOVE to go out for a beer. We talk a bit and make plans for the next week.  During the week leading up to our "date" he would stop me to say hello and repeat how he couldn't wait to go out, how he was so looking forward to our beer.

So Friday night, we meet at a bar near my (our) apartment.  We order drinks and food.  Conversation was good.  It was an easy flow to it.  When he laughed at any of the several hilarious things I said, he'd playfully nudge my leg or touch my arm.  So as we were finding out about each other, he shared that he didn't get out much because he has a 3 1/2 month old daughter. 

Wow, 3 1/2 months is a new baby.  So that slows me down a bit.  But we continue talking and laughing.  I mean hey, babies happen. It doesn't mean that he and baby's mama are still together and did I mention we were having a great time.

So I ask him, "So, who all lives upstairs with you?"  He says, well its me and Leyla (my daughter) and Paula, my wife.

Um, excuse me say what now?

Yep, I heard him correctly.  He lives upstairs with his wife and daughter.

So I'm wondering, "Am I reading too much into this date?  Maybe it isn't a date at all.  Maybe its just a friendly beer between neighbors."  But he was all touching my leg and arm and what not. Laughing at everything I said.  I'm funny, but not that durn funny.  I have two choices, either I can say if you are married, what the hell are you doing at a bar with your female neighbor without your wife.  Or I can not say anything and assume that it is I that have misread this whole situation.

I decide on the latter and finish this "date".  I finish my cocktail and I tell him that I have to make it over to my friends house before 11.  We are walking out together, still talking.  He is giving me his recipe for sangria.  After we find my car, I turn to him to tell him good night.  He takes one step towards me.  He says it was great and thank you so much for inviting him out.  That note really brightened his day.  I said, oh your welcome, it was fun and my pleasure. I take a step back.  He takes a larger step towards me.  I can feel his jeans on the side of my leg.  This dude is actually moving in for a goodbye kiss.  I take a step back and tell him goodnight again and turn to walk to my car.  So yeah, this situation is crystal clear.  Mr. Upstairs Neighbor is a married man, father of a new baby girl, out on a date with some woman, while his wife is at home taking care of their child.

I don't understand people sometimes.  I don't think I understand men most of the times. I wasted a good two hours of my life and I want it back, asshole.  Maybe I should put that in a note and leave it on his car . . .


  1. Girl stop! I cannot believe this. This was so blog worthy!!!! LMAO!

  2. yeah, so it goes! an endless stream of i want it all man mindset!!SMDH.. The story was much better in person! lol


  3. Michelle, Michelle, when are you going to listen to me. Ask if they are married before you go on the date. I asked you on FB and you said you don't see women in his apt and no ring. I am telling you, if you don't ask they won't tell. Never Assume. Yes, he is a jerk.

  4. no, on FB I said, I would go on the date first and then ask. I wanted to at least get a date out of it. And I did. And besides, if I make all of these cautious decisions, I wouldn't have ANYTHING to blog about. hahahaha!

  5. SEE what I mean!!!!! This is why I said If it doesnt work out with my current boo.. im either not going to date for a few years or go lesbian..
    OMG OMG!!!! I HAVE A THREE MONTH OLD... OOOOH I am burnin up over this one girl!! We had such a high hopes.. wow... i think I need a drink!